The Autobus in the 801

Posted by The Rev in Sermons on May 6, 2009 | 4 responses

Smack talking and gossip are as much a part of cycling as embrocation. The group ride is a lot like a rolling sewing circle with all kinds of “did you hear?” and “He said, she said” banter. Here in the 801 a new site by an underground velo version of Perez Hilton has been causing a bit of a stir. Here is out interview with the driver of L’Autobus:

Big Ring: So…tell us about your site www.utahcylingtabloid.blogspot WTF is it all about?
L’Autobus: Its about cycling, Utah cycling to be exact….I’ve been put on a quest to liven things up. It came to me on a training ride, I was deep in the pain cave, half way through a set of 5×5x5’s when the cycling Gods spoke. They told me “There is drama in the peloton” and that I should expose it…”Go forth with cut and paste photos and your prying eye, create a blog that is just and untrue”. So now I have this blog, every week I’m posting all the juicy details about the Utah race scene and participants… you wouldn’t believe what I’m hearing or who’s saying it… somebody might get a douche bag link from time to time but I’m not throwing anybody under the team bus. I’m just pointing out to everyone whats clearly there to see, its just bike racing and if you can’t laugh at yourself, you’ll be the only one not laughing.

Big Ring: Why is your identity not being revealed? Can you give us a hint?
L’Autobus: Isn’t it more fun that way? does Kim Kardashian know who’s dishing her dirt?..nope, she just watches it on Entertainment Tonight… L’Autobus is to Utah cycling as Perez Hilton is to Hollywood, except not gay… that reminds me, so were racing across the causeway saturday, my boyfriend turns to me a says “this taste familiar”… anyway what a race.

Big Ring: What can we expect in the future from you?

L’Autobus: More of the same, I have my people in the field, gathering intel as we speak. Really L’Autobus is constantly evolving or regressing depending on how you look at it. It is an entity like in the movie Akira, assimilating with everything in its path.

Big Ring: Who is your favorite Utah road cyclist?
L’Autobus: Right now its Sleevie, he rides the bike with panache, last week it was Sohmy, next week it’s either Dave Cole or Dustin Thiel.

Big Ring: Do you consider yourself “Big Ring”?
L’Autobus: I don’t even have a little ring, what do you think!

Big Ring: When we see “news happening” where should we send it?
L’Autobus: Shoot it into my inbox, Lautobus411@yahoo.com I never reveal my sources..so go ahead snitch on the peloton.

Big Ring: Any parting words for the members of the congregation?

L’Autobus: All you road nerds think you’re so cool with your carbon wheels, CTS coaching programs and power meters, when I come spinning by in my girlfriends pants and lay a wicked skid, you’ll know who’s got the watts then. 47×13 fixed bee-otch!

4 Responses to “The Autobus in the 801”

TJ says:

May 6, 2009 at 1:37 pm

What a punk!
Moto says:

May 6, 2009 at 1:42 pm

54×11 bee-otch!
The Rev says:

May 6, 2009 at 1:53 pm

T$ you need to come out and shows these boys how to roll the Big Ring again. Also give a PhD level clinic on the art of the smack down.
Dr X says:

May 6, 2009 at 2:15 pm

T$ is the smack king, l’autobus needs to hire him as a consultant. He could also dish out some vintage, back-in-the-day retro smack.

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The Autobus in the 801

4 Responses to “The Autobus in the 801”

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